Linux->linux p-t-p, sometimes relay, sometimes direct

Trying tailscale between 2 linux (fedora 35/36) machines. One is behind “difficult” fw, one is my home router that I control. Home router has upnp enabled.
tailscale status nbecker2 ndbecker2@ linux - nbecker8 ndbecker2@ linux active; relay “nyc”, tx 775588 rx 3930268

Right now it is stuck using relay. But other times this same setup goes direct. I tried tailscale down/up a few times. Any ideas how to convince tailscale to go direct?

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I have the same issue. It’s extremely unreliable IMO. I like the idea of using tailscale as intended with ACLs etc, but this is a bit of a blocking issue.

I should add I have not used anything beyond basic default features. Just a point-to-point connection.